Month: May 2008

A rather good essay on everyday vegetarianism. Strong ending.

An interesting article on subconscious bias.

Zip Decoding, a neat visualization of the USA zipcodes. A map of the USA, roads only.

America’s Foreign Policy choices, as seen through The Godfather. Serious and insightful.

50 best ad parodies. I particularly enjoyed 41, 12, and 9.

Subversive license plate

Photo-bombers – those people in the background who ruin nice pictures. Check out Mike Matusow in the last one.

78-year old man bowls a perfect 300. Did I mention he’s blind?

Bears on the playground

Things that are younger than John McCain. Alaska for instance.

An amazing animated graffiti. I linked to an excerpt of this before.

Fail! Fail Again! Fail some more!

They still got it! Wow, do they got it!

By they, I mean Alex & Eddie of course. They are incredible. As always, the high point of the show was when Eddie came out and noodled for ten minutes. Six minutes or so were devoted to riffing on Cathedral. Everything he does looks so effortless. I remember trying to learn part of the guitar break in Running With The Devil. It was a very simple A-chord arpeggiation. After two weeks I gave up. That riff is so far down from the kinds of stuff he does without trying hard. Not to mention his incredible right hand. Between two-hand tapping, working the volume knob and the whammy bar it’s a whole second guitarist.

Wolfgang is competent. I don’t see the point of firing your bassist of twenty five years and replacing him with your kid unless your kid is significantly better in some way.

The background vocals were excellent. Eddie & Wolfang harmonize very well together. Normally I don’t review the background vocals but here they stand in contrast.

…To Diamond Dave. I wanted to like him. I could not. His day has come and gone. Every bit of music was great except him. Maybe he was good at the beginning of the tour. Last night he was a poor karoake singer. He really seemed like some crazy uncle crashing the family jam session at the annual picnic. Grabs a mic, knows half the words, doesn’t sing on pitch, refuses to phrase anything the same way twice in a row, keeps making goofy faces at everyone through his drunken slurring, and points to himself a lot. It was painful to watch. He wouldn’t sing the lyrics. He knew everyone in the audience knew all the words so he would sing just enough of them to suggest that he could darn well sing them all if he really wanted to, he just didn’t want to. Yeah right.

Speaking of singing guitar players, I did like Dave’s guitar playing. He did a flatpicking demo which led into Ice Cream Man. I had always assumed that was Eddie on the acoustic, it was him? Maybe he’s the second guitar on Could This be Magic also.

I suppose my review is the same as every other time I see them (this was my third and a halfth time). Eddie is God. Alex is Godlike. There are allegedly some other people in the band but why would you pay attention to them?

Update: Here’s a quote from Fargo Rock City reinforcing my view of ol’ Daimond Dave.

At every wedding dance, there is always one uncle who drinks too much, dances too much, and tells the most ridiculous stoiries over and over and over again. He’s the hero or the goat of every story he tells, and you can never quite tell if he’s the most boorish jackass in your family or the most charming fellow you’ve ever met. David Lee Roth is that uncle

I hosted last night. It was with a different group of people. It was much looser and more social.

How’d I do? I think I played great. I outplayed everyone else. (I think. You never really know.) In the first round, I dominated. I had some good cards and some good bluffs. I confused the table by doing a lot of checking in the dark with first action – they didn’t know whether that meant weakness or strength.

But the bad beat streak continued. I think I was involved in about 10 bad beat hands. 2 of them were in my favor. 8 of them were the other guy bad beating me. Is it worth telling about any of them? No, but I will anyhow.

I went into heads up play with a 3-1 chip advantage. I ended up going all in with A-9. He had K-9. He got his K on the river. I was struggling after that. I went all in with a pair of 8s. He called me with J-8. He got his jack on the river, I got second place.

I felt like Phil Helmuth. I was going in with the right cards. I was making the right folds – I had to dump J-J one time and Q-Q another when overcards drew heavy betting. I went all-in with the best hand at least a half-dozen times. And it didn’t matter, I still got knocked out by bad beats. I also talked like Phil Helmuth, I was jawing at everyone. I like to tell everyone else what they should do. I’m always surprised how much they listen.

My favorite hand no one saw. I was short-stacked and drew Ad-4. It was enough for a semi-bluff, I went with 300 (3x) preflop. The chip leader called. The flop came 3-4-5 of diamonds. I had middle pair and a draw to both the straight and nut flush. I put in another 200. Partially because I thought my 4s were good, partially as a test to see if I could push him off the pot. He raised me up to 500. He was a conservative player who just played the value of his cards (I doubt he bluffed during the whole night). I called. The turn was something unremarkable, maybe 9c. I checked. He put in 400. I only had 1,000 left with 100-200 blinds coming next hand. Tough call. If I went all in, would he fold? I had checked already, could I represent strength? Was he sophisticated enough to be using his chip lead to bully my short stack on a bluff? It would be calling something like 1/4th of the pot, and there were 9 diamonds, 4 2s, and 2 4s for my outs. 15 outs said I should call him.

But I folded. For what it’s worth, he said he had something good, I think he had the flush already. Even though the math says I should have called him, I think it was a good fold. Sometimes the math has to give way to the read.

It was a very fun night. I’m tempted to not report financials, because it was a great night of entertainment for the price. But I suppose I have to keep it honest.

Net winnings: $-10
Overall: $-64

P.S. Mrs Muttrox played also. She played an early nut straight perfectly, getting two other players all in and getting a large chip lead. But from then on, she was very tentative. It’s only her second game, she has a hard time playing with anything less than super-premium hands. She got blinded down until she was forced to go all in and lose with a K.

Tonight we did knock-knock jokes. Here’s a typical knock-knock joke from a 5-year old:

Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Table.
Table who?
Table shirt! Ha ha!

We did this for twenty minutes. Then the two-year old wanted to play.

Him: Daddy, daddy! Knock-knock!
Me: Who’s there?
Him: Sugar!
Me: Sugar who?
Him: (looking confused and desperate) I don’t know!

This might be the dumbest editorial I’ve ever read. An astounding display of sheer stupidity. I was looking forward to reading Caplan’s book, now I’m not sure I’ll bother. Read it and behold the stupidity.

Bert & Ernie discuss the primary.

Another brilliant mashup on the end of Hillary’s campaign.

The complete Democratic Primary, in 7 minutes.

Monty Pythons’ Dead Parrot sketch, for the Clinton campaign.

A Tale of Three Lawyers: Read about Matthew Diaz, this years winner of the Ridenhour Prize for Truth-Telling.

Political dorks unite! Fantasy Congress is here!

Ronald Reagan’s losing battle with Alzhiemers. The last paragraph was particularly sad.

The 5 most badass presidents of all time.

William Buckley on Laugh-In. I had no idea he was so witty. You can also the predecessor to Fred Admunsen’s “Nicholas Fein political comic” schtick.

Just a nightmare. Couldn’t get a hand to save my life. I bluffed, everyone calls. I do the exact same bet with a good hand (A-10 suited), they all fold. I foolishly chased twice so it wasn’t all because of bad cards. Just a lot of it.

I went all-in with a pair of 9s on the final hand. I was called with J-9. He pulled a straight. Once again I was all-in with the best hand and lost anyhow. However, even if I had won that, the blinds were about to make the big jump and I would have had only 3.5 big blinds. So I’m not too mad about it, I was already in bad shape.

Tonight: $-20
Overall: $-54

Perspective

The dumbest human being in the entire world.

Kobe Byrant jumps over an Aston-Martin.

ABC does the Lincoln-Douglas debates

A collection of funny graffiti.

It’s the 30th anniversary of spam (the technology kind). Here is the first spam ever.

Dissapearing Rabbit Trick (amazing pic)

Dumb protester Here’s another.

Chickipedia. Fun for men.

Fun with auto-looping, Reggie Watts does a sort of Bobbi McFerrin thing

Now that is a great website intro.

A ten-year old’s letters to serial killers. Answered.

The best (worst) weathermen names.

The mentos-mint world record is broken.

Everything is made in China. Even “Free Tibet” flags.

Teenage hijinx in Saudi Arabia

We were fifteen minutes into Game 6. The boy turns to me and asked, “Why does everyone keep saying Jesus?”
“Who’s saying it?”
“Everybody!”
“You mean, on the TV?”
“Yes!”
“They’re saying Jesus?”
“Yes, they all are!”

I had no idea what he was going on about. I blew it off. “Sure, let’s just watch the game, see there’s a dunk.”

Fifteen minutes later, I got it.

“Oh, defense! They’re not saying Jesus, they’re saying `Defense!`”
(Long pause)
“I don’t like it when they say defense that sounds like Jesus.”

Later that day when I cut my thumb I yelled “Defense Christ!” It felt good to have a new swear.

Yesterday I saw someone wearing this shirt:

Rules of T-Shirts:
1. References to popular TV shows are uncool. The more people like it, the lamer it is.
2. TV shows referenced should be cool shows. The Simpsons, Arrested Development, etc. CSI does not fit this category. Ironic references are fine, Airhawk, Dallas, Happy Days, etc. It won’t be long until CSI is in this category. You are not being prescient to get the shirt now, you are being weak.
3. New meanings for standard acronyms are not funny. They are lame.
4. Comments about other people’s intelligence are risky. No one can stand idiots. You are not special in this regard. However, just because you associate with idiots does not mean you are not one. In fact, it increases the odds that you are also an idiot. You would be better off advertising how much you enjoy hanging out with smart people.
5. Paying $27 for an uncool t-shirt is the final evidence proving that you are the idiot.

I can’t believe we’re going to Game 7. Unlike Games 3 and 4, where the Hawks played out of their head, the Celtics lost this one by choking in the clutch.

In a 5-minute stretch in the fourth quarter everything went wrong. They suddenly turned into a bunch of cowards. There was no offensive movement so the point guard would hold the ball waiting for something to happen. It wouldn’t. They’d dump the ball into Garnett. Garnett would make some nifty looking moves. But you could see he didn’t want to actually attack the basket or shoot, he always kicked it out. The Hawks got two steals by anticipating that pass and stealing it. Rondo slashes into the lane, jumps far above anyone else and looks to pass it instead of laying it in. Another steal. This went on for five minutes until they somehow found their cojones.

A minor helping of scorn for the refs. The double-technical on Cassell and Johnson should have only been on Johnson. Two of Pierce’s six fouls were completely wrong. In a tight game, these can make the difference.

Special scorn for Kevin Garnett. Holy cow, just take the ball in. Yes, there are some good blockers but not good enough to stop you. Get the fouls on them. Or wait to pass until they do commit themselves. You are a better player than they are, you’re the goto franchise player. You need to score, or at least sell the scoring act.

May 3rd is free comic book day. Find a store near you and support the lowbrow arts!

Suppose you had a piece of cake to divide up between two people. Each boy wants to get the biggest piece of course. Is there a fair way to make sure each gets half? Most of you probably know the classic answer. One boy cuts, the other chooses. That way the first boy is motivated to make a perfect cut. There are versions out there for multiple boys.

Have you ever tried this in real life? It quickly becomes clear that it is not particularly fair. Get a piece of cake and try to split it in half. It’s hard to do. It’s even harder if you are five years old without a lot of fine motor control. One piece will be significantly bigger than the other. The task of choosing which piece is bigger is much easier than making two equal halves. The second boy has a huge advantage. The unfairness moves to the level of choosing which boy gets assigned which role. Intelligent children will thus try to be the chooser rather than the divider. How do you decide who gets to be the chooser?

You could flip a coin. Flipping a coin is fair. But if you’re going to do that, why not have either of them slice the cake. Rather than flipping to decide roles, the winner of the coin flip gets to directly choose which slice they want. That’s a fair method, why complicate things with roles?

Applied math is hard.